Chapter Ten: The Marauder’s Map
In chapter ten of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban Harry finds out his godfather caused the death of his parents, REMUS LUPIN agrees to help Harry with his dementor problem, and the twins give Harry one of the greatest gifts of all time.
(Please be advised that this is a reread and I will be discussing book and movie spoilers.)
One of the best overall chapters in all of Harry Potter opens with our boy Harry suffering in the hospital wing, and I’d like to feel sad, but how can I when this happens:
The Gryffindor team visited again on Sunday morning, this time accompanied by Wood, who told Harry (in a hollow, dead sort of voice) that he didn’t blame him in the slightest.
How can I not laugh at my Scottish prince’s tragique despair? How can I not appreciate that as dead inside as he clearly is, Wood still reassures Harry that it isn’t his fault?
Captain Oliver Wood, Gryffindor, dead inside, nobly trying to convince thirteen year old boy who feels guilty that he isn’t to blame for the team loss.
So Harry’s freaking out about the Grim, (THANKS SIRIUS YOU WEIRDO) dementors, (THANKS FUDGE YOU ASSRAG) Lily’s murder, (THANKS VOLDEMORT YOU PASTY FREAK) and Malfoy’s shitty attempts at comedy (THANKS LUCIUS AND NARCISSA YOU INBRED BLONDES) but no one worry, because REMUS LUPIN has returned!
Remus is back to tell everyone to not listen to Snape and his shitty, transparent Werewolf essay (too late Hermione’s figured it out Lupes!) and also to tell Harry about the dementors and Azkaban, and agrees to help teach Harry to fight a dementor. Let’s pause to dance an interpretive appreciation dance for REMUS LUPIN here who is dealing with: the horror of thinking his ex best friend killed his other three ex best friends, hiding his werewolf condition, illness, and Snape, and yet still offers to lend hours of his precious free time to help Harry learn the Expecto Patronum spell when he’d have no idea that Harry would show aptitude so young for this spell. This could’ve taken years! Many full grown wizards can’t do it! And yet Remus agrees to help. Who wants to start a Remus Lupin fanclub with me?
Ravenclaw beats Hufflepuff in Quidditch and Oliver Wood “became repossessed of his manic energy” and for once in my life I’d like to love something the way Oliver Wood loves Quidditch. Think of all I could accomplish!
Poor Harry’s stuck at Hogwarts for another Hogsmeade weekend and all seems terrible until Fred and George pop up and give Harry perhaps the greatest gift of all time. It’s a tough call, considering he also gets the invisibility cloak his first year, but it is a mighty gift that proves how highly Fred and George think of Harry. Not only do they give him the map over their own brothers or sister, but they give away the map to Harry when they’re still in school and could 100% still use it to get up to hijinks for two and a half more years! It’s moments like this that you realize how secretly kind Fred and George really are, even if they do terrible things to their siblings from time to time.
Harry’s sneaking off to Hogsmeade with this precious magical artifact and look, I’m not even going to pretend that I’m mad that Harry does something this selfish and reckless when every adult is trying to keep him safe and away from Sirius and the dementors. I would’ve, without doubt, done the same.
Ron and Hermione are in Honeydukes when Harry creeps up on them, (and really, it’s great that Harry’s so morally upright when he now has not one, but TWO ways to sneak around undetected) debating whether to buy Harry something called Cockroach Clusters or not and COME ON GUYS of course not! Do you hate him?! Who wants to eat the unholy combination of my mortal nemesis, Cockroaches, combined with the most blessed of food, chocolate?!
Hermione immediately starts trying to convince Harry to turn over the map and while she has a point, I don’t blame Harry at all for not doing it.
Our trio decides to go to the Three Broomsticks and there they overhear a conversation full of government secrets and/or juicy gossip spearheaded by Fudge and McGonagall, and of course, our boy Hagrid. Because, well, you know…
And hey, Minister? McG? Flitwick? Someone? Maybe do this in private or use a muffling charm next time?!
So the Minister of Magic gets drunk in a pub full of students and lets loose with a bunch of secrets about Sirius Black, and Harry, as if he hasn’t got enough on his mind, finds out that Sirius Black is to blame for his parent’s deaths and also, oh hey, is his godfather. Plus that pesky murdering Muggles and Pettigrew thing.
It’s a testament to JK Rowling’s skill that she writes this exposition heavy scene and we are riveted to every word. It’s been a while since I read this book for the first time because I’m of an advanced age
but I do remember how shocking these reveals were. Sirius and James were besties! Sirius betrayed James and Lily! It was his motorbike Hagrid rode on! He tried to take Harry! Sirius hasn’t lost his mind in Azkaban! He was Harry’s godfather! Prisoner of Azkaban is the most solidly written, shock filled book of the series and I stand by that statement.
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Better gift: invisibility cloak or the Marauder’s Map?
Why do Fred and George give the map to Harry instead of just lending it to him?
Would you have used the map to go to Hogsmeade?
Would you have turned the map in?
Would you eat a Cockroach cluster?
Why does Fudge and co have this talk loudly, in a public pub?
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