Chapter Thirty-Four: Priori Incantatem
In chapter thirty-four of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire Harry is beyond brave, Voldemort toys with him like a gnat, and the dead come back to life to help Harry and wow, is it dusty in here or is it just me?
(Please be advised that this is a reread and I will be discussing book and movie spoilers.)
Harry’s given back his wand and is told to duel Voldemort and honestly, this moment is thus far the most terrifying, bleak moment in the series that showcases Harry’s innate bravery at its best. The poor kid is about to die with thirty mocking adults watching by the evil monster that killed his parents and Harry…fights back like the BAMF he truly is. HPotz thinks about the last time he dueled (thanks for the moment of levity, Harz!)
And I guess remembering Lockhart and the time he had to impersonate a werewolf in front of his classmates was so traumatic that Harry is able to pull it together, and refuse to bow to Voldemort and MARRY ME HARRY YOU ABSOLUTE BEAST!
Let’s take a moment to acknowledge what overwhelming assholes the Death Eaters are when they laugh at Voldemort telling a fourteen-year-old child to bow to death.
Voldemort, because he’s eeeevvviiillll, decides to cast Cruciatus on Harry first, and when he tries to get our titanium spined Harry to admit it hurt, even under Imperio, Harry tells him to stick his commands up his bony white snake ass, then pops some gillyweed
and saunters away, the Death Eaters cheering this sick burn
while Cedric magically comes back to life to go on to have a storied Muggle acting career
and Harry lives with Sirius happily ever after!
Oh, sorry, I thought we were sharing fantasies on how this chapter could’ve gone. Anyway, Harry refuses to comply to the Imperio, and wow, shouldn’t have let Barty teach him that one, eh?
Harry hides behind a gravestone but meets his death head on, like an old friend,
with a well placed Expelliarmus and look, I’ve got to point out Gilderoy Lockhart has saved the wizarding world! Oh, you handsome devil, you did it! Well done, you.
Something happens that no one forsees when Voldemort’s and Harry’s wands connect like liquid lightsabers and Harry fights, fights, fights for his right to party to get the magic laser beams to rebound on Voldemort instead. Old Vold’s wand vomits up his last spells like a frat boy after a kegger
and I’m only making jokes because Lily, James, Cedric, Bertha, and poor, unappreciated Frank come back to pump up Harry and attack Snake Boss when Harry lunges away, Oliver Wood screaming that’s my boy randomly out loud in his room for no reason and this shit is SAD.
Harry grabs the cup and I grab a box of tissues, because we’re going to have to discuss that heartbreaking scene with 2 Diggory’s 0 cups next recap.
<—Previous Chapter Next Chapter —>
Join in with your thoughts below, on twitter, or instagram with #ReadHarryPotterWithMe. Follow me on my twitter @HSecretLibrary, pinterest, and my instagram @hermionessecretlibrary
So would Barty have gotten punished for teaching Harry the Imperius Curse if he’d ever been found out?
Which murdered soul made you saddest on return?
Gilderoy Lockhart actually saved the wizarding world here, right?
Picture taken in Nimes, France. Send me/tag me in your pics of you reading Harry Potter!